It Doesn't Make Sense

Recently, an old friend approached me about the possibility of sitting down to share the story of what I went through when my parents divorced. She said that she was collecting stories of people whose families had been through separation and divorce. Children of divorce who'd somehow made it safely "to the other side". {For lack of much better words.}

My baby brother and I around 1988.

I called my little brother, and we talked about it briefly.

Our parents divorced when I was 22 and my brother was 19. They'd been living apart for a couple of years off and on, and much of their relationship's difficulties stemmed from my father's struggle with alcoholism. Being an adult child of divorce is much different than being a young child of divorce. The perspective completely changes regarding all of the years you've lived as a family unit, and your view of your future becomes all but invisible.

The bottom line for my brother and I, during that brief conversation, was just that it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make any sense that he and I are both still believing God is for us in this life. It doesn't make sense that we have such a healthy, strong relationship as siblings. It doesn't make sense that I'm in a healthy, loving, Christ-centered marriage. It doesn't make sense that my little brother and I are both involved in a thriving, Bible-believing, Spirit-filled church.

It doesn't make any sense...but God.

My mom, brother, dad, and me on my wedding day.

I have always said that I felt that God reached down and plucked Blake and I up out of a situation that could have completely changed the course of our lives. We were at such life-altering ages, and could have completely abandoned our faith based on the decisions our parents made. But God. For whatever reason, our good God saw fit to rescue us. To point us both in a direction toward men and women who would "parent" us when our parents couldn't. To fill our lives with mentors, dear friends, and people who shepherded us through a season that was one of the toughest we'd ever seen.

All I can say is that I'm unbelievably thankful. It doesn't make sense, but I'm so thankful.

So thankful that what may not make sense to me somehow makes sense to God.

O Lord my God, you have performed many wonders

for us. Your plans for us are too numerous to list.

{Psalm 40:5a}

Hebrews 12:11

It's around 1:00 on Thursday afternoon. At our house, that means it's nap time. From {pretty much} the day she left the womb, Allie has protested sleeping during the day. {I realize what a blessing and gift it is that she has slept through the night since she was 5 months old, and doesn't seem to ever have issues with that. I do not take it for granted, and I *love* my night time sleep.} That said, a day in which a 6-month old, 1-year-old, or now 18-month old does not take a nap is a very looooooong day for mama. (Read more about my nap time battles in this previous post.)

As I sit and type, I can hear my little one crying in her crib across the house. It's one of those awful "mommy situations". Like dropping them off in their nursery class when they kick and scream and don't want to go, but you know they have to. Like giving them a spanking when they're hugging and kissing and "I'm sorry-ing" to try to get out of it. Like putting them in time-out when you really want to keep playing with them and hearing their cute little giggles. Letting Allie cry at nap time has worked well for us, and she usually falls asleep fairly quickly. {Staying asleep - that's another story.}

When I put her down today, after reading a few books, singing, and rocking with her, she immediately began to cry. Let me tell you - this kid can go from no tears to a full-on sob within a matter of milliseconds. She's good. So she started to cry. Only this time, she didn't just cry. She reached up for me and cried, "Mama!" Oh. My. Goodness. How am I supposed to ignore that?! Hard and heart-breaking as it was, I walked away, and closed the door behind me, nearly welling up with tears myself.

I suddenly pictured God, my Abba, my daddy, going through that same scenario with me.

You see, I've been going through a season of some serious impatience in my life. There are lots of big things around the corner for my little family, and I'm tired of knowing they're "around the corner". I'm ready to be at the corner, or just whatever it takes for these changes and blessings to take place in our lives! I don't want to wait on God's timing. I don't want to be patient. I don't want to pray "Your will, not mine".

So, leaving Allie's room, I pictured the Lord just putting me into that crib. A waiting room of sorts. I can't get out until he picks me up and lets me out. I just have to sit there. Maybe I'm supposed to rest. To sleep. To know that being right there is right where He placed me, and He knows far better than I do. Maybe He knows that I will enter into this new season much healthier and more joyful if I have this time of rest first. The same way that I know the rest of Allie's day will go far smoother if she will take time out to sleep before jumping back into her afternoon of spreading endless toys all over the house.

Why is it so difficult for me to remember this little truth? That He knows better. That He is good, and He is for me, and He has me in this season of waiting for a reason. A reason I may not see, but a good reason none the less.

Hebrews 12:11

  All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; 

yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it 

yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

Though I feel, now, as if blessings are being withheld, I trust that God is bringing me into a season which will "yield the peaceful fruit of righteousness".

{Baby girl is still crying, standing in her crib...He knows better. He knows better. He knows better...}

Love One Another

Over the past few weeks, we have been reading Tom Holladay's Relationship Principles of Jesus as a church. I have learned and relearned some amazing and applicable truths about how important relationships are to Jesus. By far, the most life-changing truth I learned, and really began to understand, was the simple commandment Jesus gives: "Love one another."

Love one another. I've heard these words probably since before I could understand them. They've been taught by Sunday School teachers, preached from the pulpit, and read over and over in a thousand devotional books. It was always easy for me to think I knew - and lived - what those words meant. I mean, loving others is easy, right? You don't go out of your way to be mean, don't talk about friends behind their backs, etc. I think my definition of loving others was more like a "what not to do" list.

Through reading this book, I began to really see and understand what it means to love others. To act in love. To be loving. To really, sincerely, genuinely apply the Golden Rule. To actually "do to others what you'd want them to do to you". To think of others before I think of myself, and to do so with a genuine love for them, and concern for their well-being, and their walk with God.

I have been deeply encouraged as I've walked through this learning process over the past few weeks. I've seen so much undeniable evidence that it truly is God's kindness (and His lovingness) that brings people to repentance. Why have I not been quicker to show such love and kindness to those around me?! I'm saddened to think of all of the opportunities that I've missed, but SO excited to move forward, walking in this new Jesus-empowered-love toward those He places around me!

What's on my DVR?

A friend of mine recently did a post about what you could find on her DVR. I think it's a fun little idea, so here goes...

We watch a lot of TV. I know, it's probably more than we should. It's something we really enjoy, that's relaxing for Adam and I. We love picking out TV series' on Netflix to watch together, too. It isn't often (anymore) that we get a night out at the movies, so sometimes we lay in bed and eat popcorn (and M&M's, if it's up to me) and watch our favorite shows together. Date night at home :). Lest you assume otherwise, most of these are MY picks, not Adam's. He watches crazy boy things like UFC fights, and action/adventure shows. Me? Not so much.

Ok, so this is a bit of a cheat. I'm watching Felicity on DVD, but it's definitely what fills my TV screen a lot of the time. I love to have it on while I'm working on monograms or designs.

We (yes, we both watch this one) started watching this show last fall via Netflix, and are now finishing up the final season as it airs on DirecTV. LOVE this show. I love that it's about a real, Texas family who is loyal, honorable, and respected in their community. Sounds cheesy, but it's awesome. All this from a girl who really isn't even into football. Blasphemy in Texas, where we are hosting the Super Bowl a week from now, I know.

Grey's Anatomy. I've watched it from episode 1, so I can't stop now. It's really funny, actually, because I can't stand to watch bloody, shooter movies that Adam picks out, but somehow I can make it through an hour-long medical drama each week.

The Good Wife. LOVE this show. It hasn't received much attention, but it's really good. It's a legal drama about a woman whose political husband was unfaithful to her. It goes through the ups and downs of the choices she has made to stay by his side and keep their family intact, and also follows her cases as a Chicago lawyer. It's a very clever show, and I am almost always surprised by a great twist at the end of each episode.

Brothers & Sisters. Wow - I didn't realize how many dramas I watch! I love this one - especially the matriarchal figure played by Sally Field. She's amazing in this role as Nora Walker, watching over the lives of her 5 grown children and their families.

Modern Family!! We LOVE this show. It is SO stinking hilarious! I don't even think I can single out a favorite character. They are all so funny and quirky! Phil is probably my favorite, because he's a very typical "thinks-he's-super-cool" dad. It's basically awesome.

We love The Office, Parks & Rec., making fun of The Bachelor from time to time, and I'm also a huge sucker for red carpet specials before award shows. Love those! So, these are just a few things you'll find us watching from week to week - along, of course, with 'Special Agent Oso', 'Jungle Junction', 'Miss Patty Cake', and lots of 'Baby Einstein' DVD's!

What's on your DVR?

Happy 2011!

2010 was one busy, crazy year for the Rieger family! Our God has been so faithful through every bit of it, and I am so thankful He is always constant!

The new year is always a time of reflection for me. I tend to need to reflect on the past year before I'm able to really look ahead to the new one. I love to see all that's taken place, all that's been accomplished, all that's been gained and lost in the past, and see God's hand in all of it. This is really all just for me - processing, thinking aloud, and taking a look back at the year, so that I can wake tomorrow ready to move ahead into ALL that God has laid out for me in 2011!

2010...
*I've never been more proud of myself than I am for nursing Allie for the first year of her life. This was one of the most challenging things I've ever done, and I am thankful to God for placing encouraging mommy friends around me to tell me it would get better - and it did! So thankful I was able to give her this gift.
*I rang in 2010 by bringing Allie home from the hospital.
*We went on our first ever family vacation to see my one and only cousin get married on the beach in Florida. It was so fun and memorable, and we're so blessed to have Mary as a part of our family now!
*Adam and I celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary and 6th year together - Praise God!
*The iPhone 4 came out (I know this seems lame, but it's allowed us to document SO much of little Allie's life - such a fun blessing!)
*I've watched my dad go through lots of struggles this year, and learned a lot about trusting God through this process. We are continuing to pray for complete healing in his life, and that God will have victory over Dad's addiction.
*This year, I enjoyed shopping for my daughter much more than for myself.
*We had so much fun watching the Texas Rangers play in the World Series!
*We experienced our first (and hopefully last) trip to the E.R. with Allie, when she fell off of the kitchen counter-top out of her bumbo seat. I am still so thankful to God for protecting her from any worse injury than a goose-egg on the head. Thankful, thankful, thankful.
*I didn't teach, help with, or attend a single sewing lesson at Memaw's house. For the first time in my life. I think 26 years was probably enough, but I do miss being with my precious Memaw daily.
*I got beautiful diamond earrings for my first Mother's Day. Shortly after, I got my ears double-pierced so that I could wear them always.
*God drew me closer to Him through many late-night prayers when I was up with Allie.
*I watched my little brother grow and mature in Christ, and become a true leader in the eyes of our family. So thankful for him, and the healthy relationship we have.

I have lots of "I wonder"'s about 2011. I am praying that God will keep my eyes fixed on Him as He leads me through this year, drawing me closer to His side, and working in and through all of the relationships He has placed me in. I have a few small, hopefully attainable, goals for the new year.

*Calorie Counting for all of January at least. This helps me be more attentive to what I'm eating. It's not a weight-loss plan, just a "mindfulness" plan. Doing this ever so often is always eye-opening to me.
*Being better about meal/grocery planning and spending. I know that planning ahead saves both time and money, and I need to purpose to do that.
*Seek opportunities (and TAKE the opportunities) to bless and encourage those around me, showing the Love of Christ. I want to be intentional about encouraging others - whether by cards in the mail, notes on Facebook, phone calls, or face to face time together.
*Pray with Allie more. Sounds simple enough, but this is a lifetime habit I want to root in her from a young age. I want to build more prayer into my life, too, and why not do it together? :)

I am so grateful that, whatever this year holds, God holds all of it in His careful, big-enough hands to carry it all.

Summer Splash 2010

I.love.my.church.

This past weekend, I attended my second annual Summer Splash at Milestone Church. It was such a sweet time of learning and fellowship! Friday night, our amazing pastors' wives put together a hilarious intro to the weekend. It seems that, at each women's event, we love to humiliate at least one man by asking that he dress up as a woman and act out something embarrassing. It definitely got everyone loosened up and excited about the weekend! (View part of the intro on the Milestone Women Facebook Page.) So funny!

Beautiful decorations in the atrium at church!

Streamers that landed all over me!

Holly Wagner (author of the God Chicks books) was our guest speaker for the weekend. She was so great! High-energy, funny, and full of truths that I definitely needed to hear. She spoke a lot about what it means to "stay at your post". I am still pondering all of the truth that these verses hold. They'll definitely be on some 3 x 5 cards on my mirror in the near future.

2 Corinthians 6: 4-10 (MSG)

Our work as God's servants gets validated - or not - in the details. People are watching us as we stay at our post, alertly, unswervingly...in hard times, tough times, bad times; when we're beaten up, jailed, and mobbed; working hard, working late, working without eating; with pure heart, clear head, steady hand; in gentleness, holiness, and honest love; when we're telling the truth, and when God's showing His power; when we're doing our best setting things right; when we're praised, and when we're blamed; slandered, and honored; true to our word, though distrusted; ignored by the world, but recognized by God; terrifically alive, though rumored to be dead; beaten within an inch of our lives, but refusing to die; immersed in tears, yet always filled with deep joy; living on handouts, yet enriching many; having nothing, having it all.

When others watch me, that's what I want them to see. That's the cry of my heart. I want them to see me living life "with a pure heart, clear head, steady hand; in gentleness, holiness, and honest love;...immersed in tears, yet always filled with deep joy." I can't wait to see, over these next weeks and months, how God cultivates and grows the seeds of truth He planted in me this weekend!

After the amazing worship and hearing from Holly, we had a 'County Fair' after party. They had everything you could imagine! Two ice cream trucks serving yummy frozen yogurt, a corny dog stand (and yes, I say "corny" dog, not "corn" dog), all kinds of popcorn, watermelon slices, and glass-bottled Coke. It's a good thing Holly didn't speak on gluttony! This was one of my favorite parts of the weekend. I enjoyed all kinds of yummy goodies, spent time with friends, made a great new friend, and did a LOT of laughing. I didn't realize how hungry I was for this fellowship! I love that God knows what I need better than I do. On my half-hour drive home Friday night, I felt so refreshed and rejuvenated, I didn't know how I'd ever fall asleep. I am SO glad we are called to walk through this life with people! I love doing life with my precious friends!

Saturday morning, there was more fun to be had. This was just part of it. Oh! I forgot to mention the awesome flip flops they gave away to everyone Friday night! They're so cute, and they say "beautiful feet" on the straps. Love them! Saturday morning, they gave us all these amazing canvas bags with our women's ministry logo on them. They were made by women in a foreign country (I can't remember where) who used to have to earn money by selling themselves, and now, make these bags to earn a living. Pretty cool! Our amazing pastor's wife, Brandy Little, spoke Saturday morning, followed by another message from Holly before we wrapped up the weekend.

I feel so blessed to have been a part of the weekend!

Learning to Listen

For around 5 weeks now, I have been battling a cough. It's the same cough that tends to visit me around this time every year or two, and it loves me so much, it sticks around for weeks on end. It began with an awful chest cold, developed into a cough, and then almost 3 weeks ago, led to (what we believe to be) a fractured rib because the cough is so intense.

I hated to have to take medicine, because of baby Allie, but it has been necessary for me to live on Robitussin from time to time! I am so thankful for a wise doctor who I can trust, though.

For the better part of the past 5 weeks, Adam has encouraged me not to talk. Talking seems to lead to coughing, so it just makes more sense to avoid talking altogether. Let me tell you - when every cough brings a stabbing pain in your rib, and talking leads to coughing - you think twice about whether or not you really need to speak!

Proverbs 10:19 says "When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise." I promise you, I am not often wise in this respect. My words are, more often than not, many. What I've learned in these past weeks is how much of my usual speech is completely unnecessary. When I'm listening to a conversation, and I have something to add, I carefully consider if it's worth it for the physical pain it might bring. It's a tough way to learn a tough lesson, but I'm thankful that the Lord is teaching me to tame my ever-busy tongue.

I've learned that my time alone in the car can be quiet and prayerful instead of being filled with end-to-end phone calls. I've learned that sitting quietly with my husband at the dinner table can be even more relaxing and enjoyable than a good conversation. I've learned that over half of the things I want to say on a whim are not deemed "worth it". I've learned how to be a better listener to those around me - without interrupting or waiting for the next lull in conversation to add my two cents.

Hopefully, I've learned just a little more about what it means to be a Titus 2 woman of God with a gentle and QUIET spirit.

Though I'm thankful to finally be feeling better, I pray I will continue to listen more than I speak, and to consider my words as wisely as I have over the past few weeks.

Stop This Train

Lately, especially in the past week or so, I've felt like life is spinning out of control all around me at a rapid pace! In the past 2-3 months, I've had at least 5 friends get engaged. As if that weren't enough, the events of the past week have gotten even bigger and better!

In the past week, well actually, in the past 5 days:

• A girlfriend I have known since we were in diapers welcomed her first sweet baby (a beautiful baby girl) into the world on July 4th.

• I found out about not one, but two friends of mine expecting little ones just a few short weeks after our Baby Rieger arrives.
• I celebrated the upcoming arrival of another baby girl with friends at a fun, frilly baby shower.
• I waited, impatiently, (and Facebook stalked) to hear (read) news of a "mystery baby's" birth yesterday. It's a boy! An adorable one, I might add, and the son of a girlfriend I've known since we were 12.

In each of these milestone events, amid the crazy hype of all of it, there are moments in which I can't help but sit back and be so completely thankful to and utterly dependent upon my awesome, giving God. He truly is the giver of all good gifts! Though sometimes I do feel like I want to "stop this train...to get off and go home again", I know that God's timing is at work, and is always better than my own.

This is a season of life I've always looked forward to, so instead of looking back, I want to revel in every minute of all that God is doing in and around me.

Psalm 36:5 "Your love, O Lord, reaches to the Heavens, Your

faithfulness to the skies."

"_____________" Pants

So, on Wednesday morning of this past week, I awoke to find that all of a sudden most of my pants are too tight. Even though I know this is really a good sign that our little, now 2-inch long little baby, is growing, it's still not easy to come to grips with. We started 2009 off by kicking off a much healthier lifestyle at our house, and both lost about 20 pounds by the time I found out I was pregnant. I know that my pregnancy will be a healthier one because of this weight loss, but it sure does make it difficult to see those pounds slowly creeping back on!

I tried on 2, maybe 3 pair of pants before I finally found some jeans that fit, with the help of my little "magic button". Thank goodness! I don't know quite what I would have done if that hadn't worked. Maybe gone shopping for some maternity pants in my pajamas? :) I didn't expect this to happen so soon, I guess. I thought I'd have more time before things started changing this much, but I'm quickly learning that is not the case. Now that I can see some physical evidence, though still very small, it is sinking in a little more each day that there's a real baby on the way.

Anyway, back to the pants. Needless to say at this point, I wasn't too excited about the newfound tightness of my waistbands. Honestly, I was pretty bummed about it. If I had a cute little baby bump, I don't know that I'd feel that way, but at this point, I just look like I'm putting on the pounds and wearing pants that are too snug! Thus...all day Wednesday, I wore "grumpy pants".

A few of my friends and I used to talk all the time about the "_______" pants we were wearing. Some days they were "Fancy Pants", others they were "Bored Pants" or maybe even "Crazy Pants", and on the not-so-good days, we wore our "Grumpy Pants". I am working hard to wear "Thankful Pants" and "Happy Pants" these days, even when the pants I put on in the mornings are just plain "Too-Small Pants".

"It's A Process"

This is the phrase I keep finding myself repeating to people lately.

"It's a process." Process: a systematic series of actions directed to some end.

Our families are both so excited about the arrival of our baby (in January of 2010, mind you), that I think some of them expect me to grow before their very eyes and deliver any minute. "It's a process," I keep reminding them.

I'm pretty sure that, in the past 2 weeks, I've been "absolutely sure" about my choice of baby furniture about 6 times. "It's a process," I have to tell myself. (At this point, I can't even begin to look at bedding/themes The furniture is the most basic part, and I can't even decide on that. Pretty sure I'll just have to "eenie, meenie, miney, moe" the bedding.)

People keep reminding Adam and I to focus on one another, and not to take this time for granted, because everything is about to change. I know we can't fully understand all that's about to happen, but I'm so thankful that we both trust and rely on a FAITHFUL God to walk us through all of it. I know that even the changes in our marriage, which I trust and know will be for the better, will be a part of this ever-changing, long process.

It's June, right? 6 Months until Christmas, 6 Months until this little gift of ours will arrive. Somehow, that makes me feel like right now, the middle of summer, is "crunch time". I feel an uncontrollable urge to go out and accomplish all of the Christmas shopping I can now, because of all of the "what-if's" rolling around in my mind. When I force myself to stop and be still, I can hear the Lord whispering to me, "Trust Me." Sometimes, I want to tell even Him, "It's a process, Lord." :)

Though the process seems like a long road ahead right now, I know I'll wake up in what seems like a few short weeks, and it will all be behind me.

Lord, help me to live out the words of your servant, Jim Elliot: "Wherever you are, be all there."

Where the Light Is

This morning, I was awakened to tell Adam goodbye before he spends the day at a church fundraiser golf tournament. He had to leave by 6:30, and I couldn't seem to fall back asleep after that.

Venturing out into the dark living room, I noticed, even though the blinds were all closed, and the curtains drawn, that the morning light was finding its way through the blind slats, and around the curtain edges. It was so comforting to see that even in a place that seemed completely dark, light was finding its way through. Whether I closed the curtains or shut the blinds, the light was still there in some small way making itself known. I love mornings. Not when they're frazzled and hurried, but when I take a few minutes to appreciate the true new beginning I'm given each morning. The fresh, piercing light is such a sweet reminder of that.

After a few minutes of sitting in the 'mostly darkness', I reached for the light switch to turn on the kitchen light. I paused before flipping it on, because it was a clear reminder of how I allow the so-called 'light' manufactured by this world to take the place of the True Light.

1 John 2:8 'Yet I am writing you a new command; it is truth seen in him and in you, because the darkness is passing, and the true light is already shining.'

Putting off Selfishness / Putting on Servanthood

I've read the words in Philippians 2 probably hundreds of times. They've never made much sense, because I have always struggled with the question of what it really means to "consider others better than yourself."

I have seen a number of people take this to the extreme of being a "doormat". A doormat is NOT what scripture is calling us to in Philippians 2! I used to go to that extreme, myself, but not anymore. The "doormat" person lets everyone walk all over them. They surrender every desire, opinion, and every opportunity to speak up. They automatically defer to the other party, and never give thought to what they want or need themselves.

A few people I know have taken Philippians 2 with a grain of salt, and basically, decided that it means "consider others better than yourself when you'd like some extra "thank-you's" or pats on the back". This group has it all wrong, too.

I've been reading a wonderful book for the past few weeks, A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George. The past two or three chapters have been focused on my relationship with my husband, and how I can prioritize it so that Adam feels loved and valued, and so that our marriage remains the number one relationship in our lives next to our Savior. The thing I love about this book is that it's overflowing with amazing examples and specific ways to carry out the instruction the author gives. For example, instead of just saying "Prepare for His Arrival Home from Work", she goes on to list ideas a wife might use during that time: Set the table, so that he knows he can expect a wonderful meal soon, turn the TV off so that it is calm and quiet, think of the things in the house that are important to him and be sure they're accomplished, refresh your make-up, brush your hair, try not to be on the phone when he gets home, etc. Reading all of these things is helping me learn how to pay attention to Adam and know that by serving him in these ways, I am serving my God and giving Him the glory for my healthy, Christ-centered marriage!

So, back to Philippians 2... I realize now, that "considering others better than myself" doesn't mean making myself a doormat, nor does it mean putting any other person up on a giant pedestal. It mean putting Christ on a pedestal, keeping my eyes on Him, and serving others solely as a means to glorify His name and purpose! The verse now makes sense in context with the full chapter!

Philippians 2

Imitating Christ's Humility

¹If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ²then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. ³Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. ⁴Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

⁵Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
⁶Who, being in very nature^a]">[a] God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
⁷but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature^b]">[b] of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
⁸And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
⁹Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
¹⁰that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
¹¹and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father...

I know it seems so basic and simple. I am called to be a servant to others because my Jesus, who was in very nature God, made Himself NOTHING. My attitude should be the same. When my identity is found in Jesus, there is no possible way that this could mean my getting walked all over and not looking out for myself. It means me recognizing my own desires, and seeking to place someone else's desires ahead of my own.

After struggling with this for years, I'm excited to finally have a glimpse into the truth that lies in these words.

One Look Challenge

A couple of weeks ago, we learned about the 'One Look Challenge' in a weekend church service.

Our church is relaunching as we move into our amazing new facility on Keller Parkway, and the One Look Challenge is a big part of the relaunch.

Take a few minutes to visit the site! It's filled with wonderful testimonies of the ways Jesus has worked miracles and changed lives of His children!

One Look Challenge

What a blessing it is to be a part of a church family that doesn't forget what the Lord has brought us all out of, and how He has rescued us from ourselves! These stories of healed marriages, new purpose in Christ, and emotional healing are what pushes me forward with a deep desire to share my own testimony with those I meet - in hopes that they might see even a glimpse of who my great God is to me!

Trusting

Trust: assurance, confidence, certainty, conviction, expectation, faith...

I've learned a lot lately about trust. It's a word that is spoken often. It has hit me recently as something I've always heard but never fully understood. (Not that there are any aspects of Christ that we can ever fully understand...)

During a sweet time of praise and worship last month, I really sensed the Holy Spirit's presence. He was bringing to mind each member of my family individually, and as soon as their faces would cross my mind, he would say, "Just trust me". I am a worrier much more than I'd like to admit. I worry about relationships, dynamics in friendships, my family's health, their walks with the Lord, the standard stuff, I suppose. As God brought to mind each of these people, one by one, He instructed me, gently, to trust Him with my worries about them, their relationships, and their walk with Him.

Since then, I've learned a lot about my identity in Christ as I've learned to trust Him more. Who am I in Him? How does He see me?

• His child: His goodness and mercy chase after me!
• He is for me!
• He accomplishes all things for me!
• He hems me in behind and before!
• He has anointed me with the oil of joy!
• He is faithful and trustworthy!
• He is my refuge and strength!
• I am blessed because He chose to bring me near to Him!
• He is sovereign over my life and everything in it.

From my list, it's easy to tell that most of the things I've discovered about my identity as a daughter of Christ are actually characteristics of Christ himself. I find my identity in who He is as my father, my protector, my leader, and my Savior.

I'm still learning a lot about this, but I'm so thankful to be walking closely with, and finally, genuinely, TRUSTING my Jesus.

What I Should Hunger For

A few weeks ago, our church took part in a 3-day fast to pray over what God has in store for us in the new year. We each made lists of specific things to pray for for our selves, our church, and other people.

It had been years since I'd fasted, and I was not looking forward to this one. I'd tried to convince myself that the Lord wanted me to fast everything else under the sun...as long as He wasn't asking me to go without food. Turns out He was asking me just that.

The first day was the hardest, really. When dinner time came, I'd already had two fruit smoothies, and couldn't stand another. I decided to heat up a cup of chicken broth. The whole time I was sipping the warm broth, all I could think of was how blissful a cracker would be. I wanted just one bite of a cracker worse than I'd ever wanted anything! For the rest of the 3-day duration, I wanted crackers more than any other food. I didn't care about big juicy burgers or sandwiches or anything else - only crackers.

The fast was set to end on Tuesday evening after the church service. We went to the service, and about halfway through, they announced that we were about to have communion. When they began to pass the communion plate, I looked up and there they were: dozens of broken pieces of crackers. My first thought was, "Crackers!!! Yesss!", but then the revelation hit me. All during those 3 days of craving crackers, what I had been craving was Jesus: His broken body, His saving grace, His Holy Spirit surrounding me.

It was the most somber, reflective Lord's Supper I've ever taken, and it will change the way I take part in them from now on.

25 Random Things

I was tagged by K. Hart to write this post of '25 Random Things About Me', so here goes...

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. I pretty much hate any and all dance-related shows on TV. Not sure why, they just annoy me. (Especially the Number One Dance Crew on MTV.)

2. I really love pink. Just about every shade of pink.

3. My favorite pair of dress pants are some I got for free at a yard sale like 4 years ago. LOVE them.

4. I hate movies with killings and blood and guts, but somehow love most medical TV dramas.

5. My little brother is one of my best friends in the world.

6. I love to get deeply involved in TV's most ridiculous teen dramas.

7. I've seen Amy Grant in concert probably 7 or 8 times.

8. I put deodorant on even if I shower right before bed.

9. Pedicures are the BEST, but I'm not a huge fan of manicures.

10. Psalm 119 is the longest chapter in the whole Bible, and it's my absolute favorite Psalm.

11. I love to watch ice skating competitions on TV purely to see the skaters bust it on the ice...as long as no one really gets hurt.

12. Adam asked me to marry him by monogramming the big question on a pretty pink piece of fabric.

13. I don't eat anything that comes from the water.

14. I hate to empty the dishwasher.

15. I nearly always smell shampoo, lotion, and laundry soap before I buy one.

16. I don't like any coffee drinks at Starbucks. Nope, none. I don't like coffee.

17. I LOVE to watch old Disney movies. Especially when I'm sick and stuck at home. Cinderella is my favorite.

18. I can't wait to have a baby.

19. I once threw up on an airplane...in first class. It was so embarrassing.

20. Favorite food: homemade mashed potatoes. They're my #1 comfort food.

21. I'm kind of a technology nerd. I love new computers, phones, tv's, and gadgets.

22. My Memaw has been one of the most influential people in my whole life, and is still one of my best friends.

23. Once, I saw Jessica Simpson sing the National Anthem on TV for a sporting event. She messed up the words at least 3 times. She said something like, "The rockets' red blare".

24. I got George W. Bush's autograph on a baseball at a Texas Ranger's game when I was in the 6th grade and he was the team owner.

25. Music can transport me back in time. I love to listen to old songs from my childhood or high school years, because they put me right back in those moments. It's totally distracting, especially if a song comes on in a supermarket or restaurant, because I think I just glaze over for a few seconds.

Change Has Come

Should we all count how many times we've heard that phrase over the past week?

Last Tuesday, the world watched as the first African-American President of the United States was inaugurated. It was, undoubtedly, an historical occasion for our country. All of the newscasters on every station have spoken endlessly about this "change" that has come to America. It will be interesting to see what kind of change it turns out to be...

Change has come to the Rieger household this year, too. Last Fall, we prayerfully left our home church and began attending Milestone Church in Keller. The drive alone was enough to deter us from going back. It takes us right around a half hour to get there, which is a drastic difference when compared to the six or seven minutes it took to get to Birchman! After much prayer, and many weeks of seeking God's clear direction, we will join Milestone sometime in the next couple of weeks.

It has been nothing short of incredible to see God's hand on this move. He has confirmed, over and over again, in so many different ways, that it is exactly where we are called to be. Whether through a first-time desire to spend time in His Word, new friendships, or a renewed love for worshipping Him in song, He has made His direction very clear to us.

I am so excited to be a part of this new family, and to know beyond any doubt that Jesus led us to it!

election day

This morning, as I was sweating my little heart out on the eliptical machine at the YMCA, a great Chris Tomlin song came on my iPod that is a perfect fit for the changes our country is facing today.

'God of this City' by Chris Tomlin

You’re the God of this city
You’re the King of these people
You’re the Lord of this nation You are
You’re the light in this darkness
You’re the hope to the hopeless
You’re the peace to the restless
You are

There is no one like our God
There is no one like our God

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this city

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things have still to be done in this city

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this city

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done here

There is no one like our God
There is no one like our God

For greater things have yet to come
And great things are still to be done in this city

(You can click here to listen to it.)

As I was listening and running, I started to think more and more about today's presidential election. A new understanding of the word "election" began to form. I thought about how scripture says that we, believers, are God's elect, His chosen ones.

I know that nothing can be likened to the all-knowing, fully wise choices that our God makes, but it did allow me to draw a parallel. We, as Americans, vote on and choose who will be our next leader. In the grander scheme of things, though, God has elected and chosen us, His children, to be instruments for Him "for such a time as this". In the same way that we desire an honorable president who will lead our nation with honesty, integrity, and wisdom, God's desire is that His chosen ones stand up and do the same. That we mark each ballot prayerfully and carefully, and that we continue, regardless of who He places in office, to honor and obey God above any candidate, political party, or anything else that might distract from Him in our daily lives. That might seem like a very elementary parallel, but it meant something to me this morning, so I wanted to share.

Be praying for our nation and its leaders today, along with every single voter!

marathon week

This has been a marathon week for us. In fact, 'marathon' doesn't seem to describe it adequately. I'll just do a quick run-down:

(Keep in mind it has been a month now since Adam's awful wreck.)

Monday:
* Got a call from the insurance company that they'd have to have yet ANOTHER form faxed over and signed before they could process our reimbursement check for the total loss of our car.
* Looked at car #4 with numerous cigarette burns all over the inside of the car.

Tuesday:
* Woke up early to go look at a few more cars.
* Met 2 different car dealers who were TOTALLY unwilling to budge on the list price. Weird. And disappointing.
* Spent much of the day online looking for used cars...withOUT cigarette burns.
* Decided, at 7 p.m., to give up and go to a reputable dealership and look for a nicer, newer car.
* Test drove a car around 7:30.
* Bought the wonderful SUV God led us to around 8:30 p.m. - and finally breathed a sigh of relief.


Wednesday:
* Returned the rental car after 25 days! Praise the Lord!
* Mailed/Faxed (what we hope to be) the final paperwork to get our reimbursement check from the insurance.
* Had an evening at home without worrying about finding a car or talking to insurance agents.

Thursday:
* Found out that my sweet Memaw has to have surgery again next week :(

Friday:
* Went to a 'Mad Science' carnival in Keller at our niece's school.

Saturday:
* Car wash for the new car.
* Home cooked fried chicken lunch at Memaw's house, where some family dynamics changed forever...
* Birthday dinner for a good friend, and games after.

Sunday:
* Took our niece to the State Fair on its last open day...CROWDED!


So yes, it has been a marathon week, but one filled to overflowing with God's faithfulness in all areas. He provided a wonderful new vehicle for us, got Memaw in for surgery so quickly, and gave us precious time with friends and family, even if it was all packed in to a busy, busy week.

Psalm 86:15 But you, O Lord, are a compassionate
and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding
in love and faithfulness.

Jehovah Nissi - Our Protector

I sit here, with Adam a few short feet away on the couch, playing golf on PS3 again, in the calm and quiet of my living room, knowing that today could have ended in a very different way.

Today could have ended in doctors offices, hospitals, or worse. Thankfully, (VERY thankfully), my precious husband and I are both home safe and sound.

This morning, Adam left a little after 8:30 to go get his mower blade sharpened. A mundane task if there ever was one. He kissed me goodbye, grabbed a granola bar, and headed out the door. I took my time waking up and getting into the shower. Just as I was about to turn the water off after my shower, I could hear my phone ringing where I'd left it on the bathroom counter. I hurriedly dried my hands and did my best to answer the phone with water dripping all around me. It was Adam.

Adam: "Don't freak out, ok?"
Me: "Ok, what?"
Adam: "I've been in a wreck. I'm ok, but I'm pretty sure your car is totaled."

All I could think about was the wreck I drove past yesterday: 4 cars on the highway; police and paramedics cutting people out of cars and pulling them away on stretchers. I had to remind myself that he had called me, said he was ok, and I had to take him at his word. Within minutes, I had my wet hair pulled back, some clothes thrown on, and was on my way out the door to go make sure he was, as he said, "ok". I had to see with my own eyes.

I kept thinking it must have been pretty bad if he thought the car was totaled, but I wasn't prepared for what I saw when I pulled up. The entire intersection where his accident had taken place was coned off. There were fire trucks, police cars, ambulances, and service people from those vehicles everywhere. And there was my Adam...standing in the middle of all the chaos. Without a scrape on his body.

That was the first time I started to cry. How could he be standing there unscathed?! What a tremendous blessing, and what amazing evidence of God's loving hand protecting my husband!
I didn't even know how thankful I should be until I saw my little Pontiac Sunfire crumpled to pieces on the side of the road.

(No, our car was not that dirty. Everything flew
out of the glove box when the passenger air bag deployed.)

Yes, we lost a car today, but we didn't lose Adam. God's grace is so great, and so undeserved. All day, every minute I was with him, I kept thinking, "What would I be doing right now if he were gone?". I am so deeply thankful I don't have to answer that question.

Thank You, sweet, precious, loving Jesus, for sparing Adam today. For going beyond that, and giving him only some tiny bumps and bruises to show for his first accident. Thank you that we have good insurance, and that You are not only our Protector, but our Provider in this situation. Though we don't know what will happen from here, we know it will be from You.