I have so many friends with babies around Allie's age who tell me, "Oh, my child takes two two-hour naps every day, I can hardly wake them," or at the least, "Just drop the morning nap, and she'll sleep for hours in the afternoon. Mine does!"I have read books, sought advice, rocked her, read to her, let her cry it out, let her sleep in my chest in the rocker, and she still just sticks to her own personal nap schedule. She prefers about 20-30 minutes in the morning, and, if I'm lucky, 45 minutes or MAYBE an hour in the afternoon.
As a stay-at-home-mom/work-at-home-mom, this makes it very challenging for me to accomplish the things I need to during the day. Not to mention the fact that it is exhausting!
I regret saying that I have only recently started praying through this frustration I have with Allie's nap schedule, or lack thereof. I want to learn whatever it is God is trying to teach me through this, and I don't think I've caught a glimpse of the lesson yet. I crave just a few minutes of solitude and rest during my days that are otherwise spent cleaning up sticky fruit juice off of the high-chair (and floor), trying to design monograms while Allie pushes the computer buttons to "help" me, rotating loads of laundry, printing shipping labels, packaging monograms, reading '1, 2, 3, Count With Me' a dozen times in a row, snuggling Allie Joy, cutting up every meal into tiny, 1-year-old bites, giving Allie a bath because she rubbed chicken and fruit in her hair - again, and picking up leaky sippy cups from every room in the house. Please don't misunderstand me. I am unbelievably, amazingly blessed to get to spend my days in my home with Allie. It truly is living out a dream I've had since I was a little girl. I love every little snuggle, watching cartoons with her, teaching her to blow kisses, answering every little "what's that" she asks, and getting to be the one to comfort her whenever she's upset. I do not take it for granted, I am grateful every day to have the title of 'Mom', and pray I will always be able to be home with whatever children God entrusts to us. That said, 'living the dream' of being at home, is not an easy job. It is full to overflowing with responsibilities.
These aren't responsibilities I take lightly, either. I want to be "that mom". The one who really does have it all together. Dishes done. Laundry put away. Prayers said for each family member, and time spent in the Word. Floors swept (and steam-mopped). A child who naps. I know this woman doesn't really exist, but she does in my dreams and aspirations! :) I am learning, daily, that I have to constantly surrender my 'post' to God. I want to stand strong in the post He has placed me in, and thrive in it. And it looks like I'm going to have to do that while learning how to manage my time and energy with a child who is awake for most of the day at only a year old. That is the task before me, and I want to grow, learn, and draw closer to God through it. Ultimately, if that's the greatest struggle in my everyday walk as a mama, I'm a blessed girl!
So, here's to a new season - not just standing strong in my post, but embracing this season of my life that I know I'll, one day, long to have back.